madishungry

 I love how we prefer sitting sit by side over opposite each other when we eat.

So I reckon I will be at your side forever anf die beside you too.

And it is easy to achieve.

Because this time, I let it go and went all out to love him with my whole heart.

And I want to do it forever.

Thank you for making me believe in love all over again.
Not a single day pass without me thinking about you. I love you more than yesterday, but less than tomorrow. So let's spend an eternity and beyond together. Let love take us on a ride till the end of time.

Lastly, I wanna be Mrs Chua:)
Can I?

I am sick and tired of waiting.
Waiting for this, waiting for that. Waiting for you, waiting for them or waiting for something that will never happen.

Waiting is something I really hate and I have been doing so for two weeks for my boyfriend to come back from Taiwan.
It is hell on earth.
I may miss him a lot but I felt some independence and freedom during these two weeks. I could do what I wanted and liked, go anywhere or whatever because I didn't have to meet him or answer to him. I somewhat enjoyed this feeling. I have never felt it in forever.

But I can't be like this because I know he needs me a lot and I don't deny that I can live without him too.

Maybe I'm a naturally selfish person.
He seems to be the one putting a lot more into this relationship than me. He is committed as hell, he gives in to me and he listens to me, buys me things and takes care of me. I want to be like that too but when will I be able to do that? Probably never.

We have an age gap. I'm twenty, young and immature. I just graduated and I still wanna play. I do feel a bit stifled in this. Obviously he is must more mature than me, I try my best to think like an adult but sometimes I just fail.

I did try to give a lot to him but I keep thinking that it is never enough. I am afraid I cannot be as committed as him.
I already told myself that my next relationship, which is this one, would be the final and last. I want to find someone good and stay with him forever. Problem is - Yes I did, I have someone who is like a dream, he is perfect but he is someone much too good for a wretched soul like me. Will this dream end? Because I don't want it to end even though I know everyone has to wake up someday.

As we are already into our third month, it feels really long. I hope our honeymoon is not over. I had previously thought that it would last forever. If we go on, there  is only two path, either we stay together and get married or we break up.

However, can someone so good like him stay with such an awful and atrocious person like me, forever...?


Goodbye.

 My beloved boyfriend comes back on Saturday, it means there are still Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday morning to go!

Six more days to go! I cannot wait to see him strolling out of the arrival hall. 

Till then, I have to keep myself busy. Sigh.

Come back soon honey, I miss you!

I miss my boyfriend so much, got to get past this two weeks. Please me over soon! PLEASE!!!

Im free from school for now yay. So exciting. Gonna start next exciting phase of life.

On the other hand, my bf annoys me sometimes. I sometimes think if he is the right one for me, would he regret being with me? Having second thoughts about his future? Gah I don't know.

He probably thinks I'm a joke, a retard or something. Like a child that won't grow up, he probably gets embarrassed of me sometimes. I won't deny the fact that I am kinda weird but this is really the true me..

Sigh, when will I be accepted for who I really am?

Mermaid Woes.